Met with the Surgeon, No Surgery or Radiation, I Have 1-2 years

 

Today was my appointment with the surgeon.

 

Before going to my appointment, Michael gave a prayer, just the two of us in the bedroom. It was SO SO beautiful. He let the Lord know what our strong desires are, how grateful we are for each other and what our marriage has become, and said wonderful things about me. I was highly complimented when he compared me to Mom, saying I was naturally like her.

 

Michael and Breanne were with me as I saw the surgeon. We really liked him, a younger man, 40-ish, Dr. Wang. We started in an exam room where he felt for the mass and lymph node. Then we went to a room with a small table and four chairs and a big screen on the wall. On the screen he gave us a quick tour of the PET/CT scan findings, showing the white spots where the cancer is--in the liver and spine. The doctor explained he was trained in Western medicine, and in Western medicine they use three main treatments for cancer: surgery, radiation, and chemotherapy. Surgery and radiation are ruled out. I didn't ask why, didn't care, but am guessing because it has spread and they wouldn't be able to get everything with those methods. As for chemo, it could buy me some time, but it has it's own side effects. What I didn't know is that chemo can also help with pain later, but still, side effects. So, it sounds like, if I do any chemo, it will be down the road. He mentioned hospice which took me by surprise. I wasn't expecting to hear that word today.

 

We asked him how long I have. That's not a question a person asks every day. He said it would just be a total shot in the dark, but guessed one year, maybe two. Maybe the oncologist will have a clearer idea about timing. He finished up with us and let the three of us stay in the room. We talked and cried and laughed. We also talked about next steps which will be intense nutrition and other natural therapies.

 

Two days ago, while sitting in the darkened room in a heated recliner for an hour waiting for the radioactive glucose to make it's way around my body before the PET/CT scan, I had a talk with Heavenly Father. Not my first on this topic. I just wanted direction on which path to take, Western medicine, or a more natural path with juicing, intermittent fasting, supplements, exercise, lowering my stress level, really finding where toxins might be in my daily life, etc. Now, our path is clear. I'm relieved the choice was made for me, and it was the one I was heavily leaning toward.

 

As we pulled into our apartment parking lot, we saw Mike just leaving for work (he takes the train two blocks from here). We had him hop in the car and we gave him the low-down as we drove him to work. He's being very brave. When we got to his work just a few minutes away, we both got out of the car to hug each other. This was the first time I've seen him misty about this. The four of us are very close knit and we talk openly about everything.

 

Michael and I are now in bed (4pm) where it's safe, both typing madly on our computers. In a minute we will watch the second of 10 videos by Chris Beat Cancer. He is releasing one video in his 10-video series each day for 24 hours. We need to watch yesterday's, then #3 comes out tonight. I have his book and that will be our guide, plus a few other things my sister Patty has been researching, and some suggestions by Tim's Jayma.

 

I see the oncologist next week but it doesn't seem like there's much to talk about. 

Michael has never gotten this alarm on his watch before. This came after our appointment with the surgeon. "High Heart Rate - Your heart rate rose above 100 BPM while you seemed to be inactive for 10 minutes starting at 09:57." Oh, but my appt was at 11:00am, so this came while we were still at home, getting ready to go.

Some of our wonderful young men and women came to "heart attack" our door last night. I accidentally busted them and ruined the surprise! But that way we got to chat. I was so touched. And it was nice to come home to after the doctor's appointment.

Note: For a girl who rarely cries, there have been a lot of tears lately. Notice there's no eye makeup? I left it all at the hospital and in the car. Got that out of the way, now I can move on.